Healing the Scars of Emotional Abuse

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You probably won't recognize it. You may not even know what it is. Unlike abuse that leaves physical marks, emotional abuse is hard to detect. Yet, there are scars. Unseen, but nevertheless, they exist in the heart of the one that was hurt. I have suffered under emotional abuse. It took me years to even recognize what it was. Then it took a bit longer to give it a name. Honestly, I didn't understand what was happening to me, but I felt trapped, scared, and eager to escape a certain relationship. All because of emotional abuse.

So what is emotional abuse?

...a consistent pattern of being treated unfairly and unjustly over a period of time, usually by the same person or people...(it) is an intentional assault by one person on another to so distort the victim's view of self that the victim allows the abuser to control him or her.  -Healing the Scars of Emotional Abuse

Gregory Jantz's book not only defines emotional abuse, but it also gives you examples and ways to overcome the hurt so you can heal. I appreciated how he even describes the effects of abuse. Perfectionism, addictions, anxiety, depression, and isolation from others are all ways that our minds and bodies try to cope. Jantz's book comes from a Christian perspective in which he encourages anyone who has been through abuse to work on their relationship with God. It is by finding out what God really thinks of us and believing that He truly loves us that we can come to a place of healing. As Jantz says, "Make your relationship with Him the primary relationship in your life."

If you are suspect that what you are dealing with is emotional abuse then reading Healing the Scars of Emotional Abuse will help you identify what is happening and will give you ideas on how to heal. Jantz describes emotional abusers {like "The Put-Down Artist", "The Ventaholic" and "The Wrath-of-God Abuser"} and then encourages you to work towards forgiveness. So many events in my life and in my relationships now make more sense after reading this book! I would highly recommend it!

If you are working towards hope and healing you can read more here.