Letters From My Father's Murderer

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Forgiveness is a process. A long one. For those who have not had to forgive a deep wound in their lives the concept of working through forgiveness may be hard to comprehend. The deeper the wound the longer the recovery and road to forgiveness. Some may not understand and say, "Why won't you just forgive?". It is not that simple. It takes time and above all God in the midst of the heartache to bring true healing.

I recently read Laurie Coombs' book Letters from My Father's Murderer: A Journey of Forgiveness in which she talks about her process of forgiving and then eventually reconciling with the man that murdered her father. The story is compelling...I could barely put it down and read it in two days! But the real value of the book is to watch the process of forgiveness Laurie goes through as she writes to the man that took her father from her.

While Laurie's story is far more tragic and painful than mine, it was interesting to see how there were similarities in our thought processes. There are just certain actions and attitudes we can take to help with forgiveness. For example, Laurie mentions praying for Tony {the man that killed her dad}. For me, praying for those that hurt me has been so beneficial in getting me to a deeper place of forgiveness. {Here is a list of verses to pray over those you are trying to forgive.} As Laurie states, "You cannot pray for someone and hate them at the same time." Another concept she lays out in the book is understanding. In order to forgive we need to see the situation from our perpetrator's perspective. If possible, we need to put ourselves in their shoes. To forgive maybe we need a new set of eyes--God's eyes. He knows the whole story--both sides of it. Many times when we are hurt we only look at one side--ours.

I can't highly recommend Laurie's book enough! It gave me a new perspective and new ideas on how to push through all the issues surrounding healing. If you are struggling to forgive may I suggest that this may be an extremely helpful book for you. Laurie Coombs also has a blog. You can read more of what she writes by clicking here.