What Forgiveness is NOT

Monday, October 3, 2011

Sometimes we think we can't forgive because it is unreasonable.  Many times though our barrier to forgiveness is the fact that we have misconceptions of what it is...

Forgiveness is NOT forgetting...at least, it isn't in the beginning.  We know full well that we have been trespassed upon.  We feel the pain too deeply to forget about it.  And while forgiveness is not forgetting it is acting like we have forgotten the offense.  In essence, we say "I know what you did to me, and yet I am going to treat you as if the sin was never committed."  The irony is that while forgiveness is not forgetting, it does allow healing which helps us to forget the offense to some degree.

Forgiveness is NOT allowing ourselves to get stomped on repeatedly. There comes a point in time when we may have to remove ourselves from a relationship in order to protect ourselves (like in cases of abuse).  We can still forgive someone without having a relationship with them, especially if that relationship is too detrimental.

Forgiveness is NOT saying that the sin committed is ok. If you have been offended or deeply hurt then obviously what was done to you wasn't right. Acting like everything is ok when it isn't is a form of dysfunction.

So then what IS forgiveness? Check back tomorrow...

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